Saturday, September 04, 2004

Our stunning local media

God, we're lucky. Having those thick glossy plastic-wrapped magazines dropped on our doorstep each week makes life worth living.

On the city side of Kings Cross we get the Sydney City Courier, sister publication to the Wenty which gets dropped on the other side of town, neatly splitting the ridge in two. Now that's community recognition.

We are so stunned by the quality of the City version we've just got to share some of its gems with you. I mean, move over Shakespeare. This stuff is up there at Pulitzer prize level.

Page five, after the ads etc, features a shirt manufacturer. The intro reads 'For Ian Austen, director of men's shirt label Edward Stripe, men's fashion is gaining an edge.' Brilliant insight. Two name-drops already, fabulous. The story starts with the revelation 'I believe that shirts are the perfect fashion paradigm for men.' Surprising.

Moving right along, on page 8 is some NEWS, or so it is labelled. 'Young designers strut their stuff' says the headline beneath a pic of young beautiful women in mini-dresses. The text begins 'Want to get the lowdown on what's hot in fashion?' Who could resist, and sure enough on page 13, right-hand-side, is the ad for the same event. Lowdown alright.

Back on page 8 is 'letter of the week' which wins a $120 hamper from (name-drop company). This letter, the only one published, comes from a guy in Woollahra, where the mag is not circulated. It is about the dangers of mixing water with alcohol on harbour cruises. Riveting.

After the Police news featuring another sniffer dog triumph in Oxford Street (no mention of the damning Ombudsman's report on the dogs' ineffective performance), we have another fashion article about the gorgeous Matthew Galasso who plugs his shop with this insight: 'When you're wearing suits seven days a week you always try and find something different. The [brandname] range for men and women is a a very wearable range.' Don't forget this circulates through the housing commission areas of Woolloomooloo. How relevant.

Then after the Fathers' Day feature comes 'Lunch with Renae' who is the sassy, perky editor. Headline under pic of fashionably bald guy: 'Rich and irresistable'. A freudian slip, Renae? Max Brenner owns a chocolate shop and the pullquote reads "My philosophy was always to put some fashion into chocolate and to 'free chocolate' ". And here I was concerned about Chechnya or Tibet.

After pages of plugs for expensive restaurants, we hit the Dads' Day features, beginning with a pic of a young gay-looking guy getting his nails done by a gorgeous girl in a miniskirt. The intro: 'Beauty was once the domain of women, but men are starting to make a dent in the market.' Next page starts... 'Bachelor beauty -- Sydney men are getting a makeover thanks to New York Beauty brand, Anthony Logistics for Men.' Logistics even! How macho!

Then there is 'Revved up -- two of Australia's most desirable cars turned heads in Rushcutters Bay'. This story must have dropped from the Wenty which covers that area.

OK, it gets even better. Random quotes from the 'Education report':

'While raising my four children, I taught myself basic skills by watching television and reading.'
'Learning is something that happens to everyone, everyday. We learn that if we don't get up by the time the bus reaches the corner, we'll miss our stop'. Take note, Board of Studies.

Our favourite (sic): 'Ever put off learning a language or enrolling in that bachelor's degree. Take up the chellenge today, it's never too late.' Yes, we have typo's too, but we don't have a bevy of sub-editors checking the copy, either.

Then, the suggestive: 'Alliance Francais de Sydney offers a lot more than classes.' Headline: 'French is the word.' Where do I sign up?
More insight: 'The Raffles La Salle Institute offers a variety of creative opportunities.' At least they seem to have moved on from 'whole range of'.
I can't take this any more. Let's just finish off with this caption appearing under a pic of John Howard and a superannuation sign: 'New Way -- Holistic approach to mortgage,' a perfect new-age lead into the real estate section.

Local media just couldn't get better. Love Sydney. It's great to see our Council supporting this mag with advertising paid for with our rates -- ever since issue one which raved about the achievements of Lucy Turnbull. Love Sydney.

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